“Without You, I Wouldn’t Be Here”
Ask J.R. how he’s doing these days, and he gets right to the point: “A lot better now than I was before.” A 65-year-old Vietnam veteran, J.R. has seen more than enough tragedy through the years. While serving in the Army in Vietnam, he experienced the horror of war and came home with PTSD.
He eventually got married and had four kids, but the trauma remained with him. He started using drugs in his mid-30s — partly to deal – J.R.with PTSD and partly to deal with the pain of losing his grandfather. “My dad died when I was three years old,” J.R. says, “so my grandfather was more like my real dad. When I lost him, I just didn’t care anymore.”
More pain would follow. Just in the last dozen years, he lost his wife of 21 years, his mother, three favorite aunts and a younger brother who was killed by a drunk driver. J.R. was in the throes of depression, and though he never attempted to take his own life, he considered it. His self-worth spiraled out of control, and so did his addiction. And it was slowly killing him.
At 5-foot-11, J.R.’s weight had dropped to 119 pounds. A friend saw him and said he looked awful. J.R. says he felt it too: “It’s kind of scary that I was that close to death’s door.”
J.R. says he has long struggled with not feeling accepted or loved, but he was “so sick and tired of being sick and tired” when he finally decided to get help. That’s when he walked through the doors of City Rescue Mission. In just two months at the Mission, he had not only gained most of his normal weight back, but he had also gained confidence, hope and peace — things he had been missing for decades. He was eating well again. He stayed sober. He found purpose.
“The Mission has helped me realize that I am worthy of love,” he says. “I got into a good church, and I’ve got good people who love me.” J.R. says that if it weren’t for the Mission, “I don’t know where I’d be, but I’d be struggling. Thank you for your support. Without you, I wouldn’t be here. God bless you!”
